Film

Toni Erdmann

Name: Toni Erdmann
Genre: Comedy, Drama
Released: 2016
Cast: Sandra Hüller, Peter Simonischek, Michael Wittenborn, Thomas Loibl, Trystan Pütter

A father crashes his adult daughter's high-pressure life in Bucharest with practical jokes and weird persona changes, determined to shake her loose from corporate numbness. Mischievous and deeply felt, it watches two people negotiate love across the gap between how they've chosen to live. For anyone who's felt that tightness settle in, or worried it has.

TMDb rating

3.5

Should you watch it?

Watch it if you like comedy that makes you wince before it makes you laugh, where a prank-loving father's awkwardness slowly turns into an ache about who his grown daughter has become.

Skip it if you want jokes that land on schedule; the humour is dry and uncomfortable, and at nearly three hours its stillness can feel like a test of patience.

What it asks of you: It is long and unhurried, with many scenes that sit in silence and let embarrassment stretch, so you need to settle in and stay with it rather than expect quick rewards.

Not sure? Find tonight's pick in a minute.

If you liked this

The Farewell2019

Family comedy that pivots on competing notions of kindness and honesty. Awkwafina carries the emotional weight while the script finds humour in genuine cultural friction and the things we do for people we love.

But Quieter than you might expect from the premise. It does not resolve in the way American films typically do, and that matters.

Boyhood2014

Linklater's twelve-year chronicle of growing up and growing apart. Like Toni Erdmann, it's patient with the small moments where distance hardens between family members, and funny in ways that catch you off guard.

But Three hours and change of incremental life. Not much plot engine; if you need things to *happen*, this will feel slack.

After Yang2022

A father tries to keep his android daughter's memory alive after a malfunction. Science fiction wrapper around something as tender and ordinary as Toni Erdmann—a parent's desperate, fumbling love for someone slipping away.

But Oblique and sparse. The emotional register is subdued, which is the point, but it won't speak to everyone.

Not sure tonight? Get a pick in a minute, starting from Toni Erdmann

The wildcard

Something you would not have found on your own.

Synecdoche, New York2008

Both films are about fathers (biological and artistic) realising their grand gestures can't reach the people they're meant for. Both watch love curdle into performance.

Kaufman's only film: a theatre director constructs an elaborate life-sized replica of New York inside a warehouse, collapsing the distance between creation and self-destruction. It's as structurally bold as Toni Erdmann but in the opposite direction—baroque where that film is sparse, about inflation instead of deflation.

But Wilfully obscure and sometimes maddening. The circular logic can feel like narcissism dressed as profundity.

The Worst Person in the World2021

Norwegian comedy-drama about a woman in her twenties trying to figure out what she wants. Funny and exasperating in equal measure, with real affection for its characters' failures and contradictions.

But Protagonist can be exhausting—that's intentional, but you have to be patient with messiness.

About Elly2009

A weekend trip among friends spirals into moral chaos. Iranian masterpiece about how quickly comfort cracks. The stakes feel immediate and the characters' desperation is painfully recognisable.

But Devastating. Not cathartic. It ends where the damage is, not after healing.

Krisha2016

Structurally audacious film about a son returning home to his family in Crimea. Uses documentary texture and non-actors to catch something raw about love and expectation and the cruelty of circumstance.

But Deliberately rough-edged and sometimes ungainly. The politics are front-loaded; some will find it didactic.

Manchester by the Sea2016

Grief film, yes, but also about a man unwillingly dragged back into relationships he's spent years avoiding. Lonergan's script finds the comedy in avoidance and the crushing weight of obligation.

But Unrelentingly heavy. There's no scene where things get better. If you need resolution, this will sit wrong.

A Ghost Story2017

A man, now dead, haunts his house and watches time move. Quietly absurd and unexpectedly funny, it's about how we cling to people and places and what gets left behind when we let go.

But Genuinely weird formal choices. The pacing is glacial and the emotional payoff is philosophical, not dramatic.

First Reformed2018

Paul Schrader's portrait of a pastor in crisis. Dry, punishing, funny in the darkest register. About faith, inadequacy, and the tyranny of caring too much.

But Visually austere and morally uncomfortable. The protagonist is sometimes unlikeable in ways the film refuses to soft-pedal.

Dogtooth2009

Both examine the architecture of family bonds—how control masquerades as care, and how those closest to us can be most effective at keeping us small.

A Greek family raises three adult children in complete isolation from the outside world, maintaining control through language and myth. Grotesque and darkly comic, it shares Toni Erdmann's interest in how parents weaponise their authority and love simultaneously.

But Genuinely disturbing. Sexual content and violence are matter-of-fact. Not everyone should watch this; ask yourself first if you should.

The Second Act of Elliott Murphy2015

Like Toni Erdmann, it's fascinated by adults refusing to behave like adults, and the comedy and heartbreak that follows. Both are about people improvising new selves too late and too obviously.

French film about a 52-year-old man who decides to become an actor, moving to Paris to pursue it. Quiet, unglamorous, occasionally funny. About the specific loneliness of reinvention and what it costs to want something badly at an age when you're supposed to have settled.

But Very slow, very French. Nothing much is resolved and the character's choices are sometimes painful to witness.